The Ashley Mis-Communication of Bitchness 10


Ashley contacted me through myspace. It started innocent enough, she asked if I was really Jewish now, since that’s what my profile says I am. I responded with “when it suits me, minus the large Jewish penis.” Clever I thought, and just dry enough to maybe show that I wasn’t really interested in talking to her, at all. She responded saying that I don’t have a small penis, and she should know then the general “what have you been up to” question. You know, actually I should just copy paste the messages here for you to read for your selves. I think I will do that and hide it behind a cut for LJ.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: à§hl£ÿ
Date: Dec 27, 2005 8:54 PM

So you’re Jewish now eh?!
—————– Original Message —————–
From: jn part three
Date: Dec 28, 2005 10:00 AM

when it suits me, minus the large jewish penis of course.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: à§hl£ÿ
Date: Dec 28, 2005 12:05 PM
Now now…Not sure that is true…but you ARE circumcised…hehe
What have you been up to? Sorry I’ve been a bitch and not talked to you. I like your page!

—————– Original Message —————–
From: jn part three
Date: Dec 28, 2005 4:10 PM

no need to flatter me, i know the truth, haha. though mine does stay flaccid and unused just like a Jewish one, haha. yeha, that means im STILL single, its been like 3 years.
whats been up? well, a lot. I work the graveyard shift at bremerton lanes now. it pretty much sucks, but its a job for the moment. i bought a new car, a 2004 silver Pontiac grand prix gt. i’ve lost 35lbs since august. ive been doing the band thing again, playing drums in Damn The Cow. We’ve been playing shows consistently every week for about 2 months now and have recorded a few little demos, up at http://myspace.com/damnthecow if you are interested. its with Calvin, Jeff and Rick(not sure if you know rick). uhhh, still drawing alot and writing. oh, and i feel worthless most of the time, haha. this is mainly because i work a job that makes me sleep during the day so i feel like i never accomplish anything. haha. what abou you? hows snohomish or where ever the hell you are?
~j

—————– Original Message —————–
From: à§hl£ÿ
Date: Dec 28, 2005 7:07 PM

That sucks it has been like 3 years…but then again, when you were dating me, that should have lasted you a lifetime! 🙂 hehe
Yeah I know Ricardo. He’s the silly “morman” kid who seemed so shy right?
I saw Calvin’s page, and his wife is cute. I’m glad he found someone.
I live in Suquamish. But starting this weekend, I will be living in Port Ludlow. (Right across the Hood Canal Bridge).
Suquamish is interesting. Fireworks all year ’round, people drunk every day, children walking around staring into everyone’s windows and stealing apples from our tree…yeah…a basic Indian Reservation…hehe. (No offense mind you)
Congrats on the weight loss. But you were pretty skinny when I saw you last. Don’t lose too much, you’d look weird if you were crack-skinny. Teddy bears are better than bean poles! hehehe…I’m a dork.
Your message seemed a little unhappy. Knock it off! Smile! You bitched about not working at the lanes when it closed, and now you are bitching that you work bad hours…you nerd.
Good that you are still drawing…
You got a Pontiac?!?! What happend to your Ford?
Well, I’m at work and I should get back…talk to you later!
*Ashley*

—————– Original Message —————–
From: jn part three
Date: Dec 28, 2005 8:03 PM

heh, dating you should have lasted a lifetime? that only would have been if you didnt break up with me, haha. yeah, him and carly have been together for a few years now, its sweet. you still with that one guy? i.e. is that who you are moving with? and hey, make fun of indians all you want, im tired of their filthy free loadingness, and im one of them! haha.
i was skinny last time you saw me? last time you saw me i weighed like 260 some lbs! are you nuts! ive NEVER been skinny. i mean, im only at 233lbs right now, but i am hoping to get down to like 210 or something.
well, i like working there, it’s just the hours are hell. working 1am to 9am is just a bitch, it really fucks with your day. and the pay really sucks, i feel like a complete loser working there, haha. oh well, thus is life.
yeah, i just bought the Pontiac, its fucking sweet. the ford was dieing and i didnt really like it anymore. the grand prix is sweet, i love it.
whats with the ‘…’ after you said ‘good you are still drawing…’ eh? whats that supposed to mean? haha. i havnt drawn any female portraits since…well since pretty much when i drew that one of you, i think i did a few after that but thats it. just havnt felt like it.
bah, works for suckers, i never do any work when im there, haha.
yeah, it’s a little sad, havnt really felt happy lately.
~j
—————– Original Message —————–
From: à§hl£ÿ
Date: Dec 28, 2005 8:45 PM

Now now, don’t use my words that way!
I meant not getting nookie lately should be ok since we dated…I mean, come on! (no pun intended…REALLY)
Yes I am still with that one guy. And we are moving to our own house. Not saying I don’t love my roomie, but paying $550 for one room, and paying $400 for a house is kind of a no-brainer…
That’s cool about your car…not-so-cool about the Ford dying…but hey…this is only your third car…I know some kids my age who have had 6 or so…sad…
Your drawing is great! There was nothing bad to be said with the “…”! I thought I could come up with something clever after that…so I put “…”. I use that quite often!
I thought you were skinny. But then again, I hate scrawny guys, so I may be a little biased…hehe.
The hours you work do suck…I guess I’m lucky to have the 0830-1700 job…
Are you still doing the Ebay thing?
So why haven’t you been happy? You can tell me! I know things about you that NO ONE ELSE DOES…do it! tell me! Dooooooo-it! hehe
How are your wrists? Do you still do the bowling thing?
uh…hmmm…can’t think of anything…
Hit me back!
*Ashley*

—————– Original Message —————–
From: jn part three
Date: Dec 29, 2005 2:51 AM

are you trying to say that you where just so good i should be fine with not having sex for a long time? you wernt that good, sorry to break it to you, ha. and i have had sex since you, and being single for three years doenst mean i havnt had sex in three years, im not a monk here, lol. though it has been awhile…

meh, you may know information about me that not many people are privy too, but that doesn’t mean i’m at liberty to discuss new plentiful bounty of tid bits about myself with you. not that i wouldn’t appreciate the sympathetic ear, but you know me i’m a little closed up about things.

hope all goes well with your move into your house. and im glad you like my drawings.
~j

—————– Original Message —————–
From: à§hl£ÿ
Date: Dec 29, 2005 7:20 PM

This wasn’t a very nice email you wrote back.
*Ashley*

and I havn’t responded yet. Not that anyone will read all of it.

What gets me the most about her responses is that she seems to think that she was the best think that ever happened to me and that I should be ok with no sex and no relationship in three years because I had some wonderful chance at dating her for the time I did. Regardless on whether this meant to be in a joking manner or not, the fact that she KEPT saying it does not make it funny to me. I already feel like shit about myself enough and I do not need her to help with that. I tried to be as nice as I could in my responses to her yet try and convene the message that what she said was not acceptable to me and I did no appreciate it. Trust me, it took a lot to not just respond with “fuck you, you self righteous pretentious bitch.”

Now since I post these updates on myspace as well, she will probably read this, but honestly I do not care. She has fucked me over so many times in the paste I’m just not willing to give her a chance at anything. There is honestly no reason to, she doesn’t deserve it from me. No I don’t hate her or have any general bad feelings for her, I just do not think it is worth my time to deal with what I know will happen if we start talking and trying to be friends again.

Tell all the English boys you meet, to let the American Boys back in the states
what fucking song is this from? I hear it at work and I want to know, please help.
~j


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