Eternally Sad but up 6


A lot of the time I feel like there is something wrong with me. Not physically of course but like in the head. Sometimes I just feel so down and like I don’t want to do anything. I will sit at my computer, then move to my couch then to my bed, the whole time thinking I should watch a movie, play a video game or work on some drawing but never will. My mind feels numb and the thought of actually doing anything is repulsive. I think sometimes I just get overwhelmed with all the things I want to do and I sort of feel like nothing will ever come of it so why should I even bother? Like we had band practice this morning and I really didn’t feel like playing at all. I just wanted to sit there and do nothing, which is precisely what I did all day long. It upsets me that I do this, upsets me a lot. Even when I’m sitting there, or laying in my bed, being useless I always think to myself “I should get up and do something, work on some art or something. Do anything besides the nothing I’m doing right now.

Maybe it’s this whole wisdom teeth thing that’s got my panties in a bunch, it really sucks not being able to eat regularly or what you want. It also really sucks when your face hurts all the time. Also it’s not like this is the first time I have felt like this it comes across rather frequently. I do think that this one is heavily induced by the pain in my mouth and having to have them taken out. It just really upsets me when I sit around and be worthless. I know the easy thing to say is ‘well don’t sit around and be worthless then,’ and that’s exactly what I would tell someone who was bitching like I am right now, but I have to tell you that it really isn’t that easy. I mean when I am to lazy to watch a movie because I just don’t think I could keep my attention on it. Or because I feel like I would be wasting 2 hours so I should do something constructive and I will sit and do nothing for 2 hours trying to think of something to do. Maybe I need the great American fix, medication.

So I just heard on the news that some law maker person is saying there is a DIRECT link between the sale or rental of pornography and child rape. I will let that sink in. Okay, you got that sunk in there nice and deep? The other part to this debacle is that he wants to but a 25% tax on the sale and rental of ALL pornographic materials. TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT!!! I don’t know about you but porn is already expensive enough, not that I ever buy any with this great invention called the internet. Now they probably did some study where they asked child rapist what they liked to watch and most of them said ‘mesa likes da porno’ so they in their brilliance thought ‘well if all these child rapist like porno then a rise in the sale of porno is directly linked to the rise in child rapes! We are so smart, lets go collect or million dollars.’ Well I have news for you, the rise in the sale of Ice Cream is also related to the rise of people drowning. Don’t believe me? Look it up. Now this doesn’t mean that people who buy ice cream are responsible for the poor souls who drown and die each year, it just means that when ice cream sales go up it happens to be the same time of year that people go swimming more and drown, i.e. summer time. It’s a fucking coincidence.

The only good thing out of this is that the money is said to be going to a fund to help rape victims, which is really good. And since I don’t buy porn to begin with it wont affect me at all. So if you are a child rapist in training you might want to think about getting a computer to download your porn to save some money for those Turtle toys and Barbie dolls. I also hear you can go into chat rooms that are just FILLED with little kids prime for the plucking. Also remember that before you ever meet up with a kid for your ‘encounter’, be sure to either castrate yourself of securely kill yourself so you don’t reproduce.
Thanks.

~j


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